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Serena
Her car was parked at the corner there,
And possessed him with a longing care,
That was not just a car parked there,
But the woman of his great love affair.
She was inside the building there,
Teacher to the many children in her care,
He thought of how she was in there,
Now that she had ended their love affair.
His thoughts returned to the car parked there,
Thoughts that stared into his longing care,
Care for the woman whose car was there,
The woman of his great love affair.
And as he sat there, looking, longing, searching, hoping,
His thoughts to whispers turned . . . . .
Listen Serena, there are things to say,
Deep in the heart and by the day,
Longings.
If you wonder of my whispers, the wounds have made me weak.
The hurts of the soul.
Tender thoughts bring the tender voice.
Tender as when I have caressed you.
Tender as I’ve felt since you left.
How I yearn for you.
Listen Serena, I want to talk to you.
I know you are not here.
Perhaps that’s why I whisper.
But you are somewhere.
Perhaps the whispers will travel.
I hope as beams of light.
I want light upon us.
This is darkness now.
There is daylight and sometimes I see it black.
I want you to hear me.
Come back to me.
There are things I did not say.
But I knew them.
I believed you knew them.
A silent communion, as if whispers.
But heard, and received, and known.
We can know things without the loudness of words.
I yearn for you daily.
I hope you yearn for me daily.
As I travel, you travel with me.
As you travel, I hope I travel with you.
This is love.
The constant presence of each other, even when apart.
You have loved me mightily.
This cannot be changed.
What once was, ever was.
Do not break it.
You will hurt your soul.
You will hurt the force of life and the force we call love.
The best of life is love.
What is the best of life?
Beauty.
Beauty, Serena, beauty.
Relief. Pleasure. Satisfaction. Contentment.
Comfort. Peace. Ease. Assistance.
This is love.
Compassion.
This is what I offer.
It is what we had.
To be apart is torment, the destruction of life.
It is the end of living, the beginning of survival.
Do not do it.
Come to me.
Listen Serena, put your ears to the air.
Sit on the hilltop.
Sense the ocean.
The grass.
The sunlight.
The blue in the sky.
Listen to the air.
There are the whispers.
This is my love for you, as a song.
The world is singing.
All the flowers, all the trees.
I am carried in all of it.
I sing to you my love.
I meant to give you so much more.
More than this.
Let me give you more.
There are more things I want to say to you.
Let me say them.
With my face against yours.
There are more things I want to do with you.
Let us do them.
We had beauty once.
We can again.
To end now is to remove the gold from the sun.
The sun wants to shine eternal.
I want no end.
I want to be able to love you further.
Do not take it away.
I miss you.
I long for you.
What is I miss you?
It is the ache of love.
It seems greater than love.
How I miss you.
And there are the tears I cry.
They are against my will.
But they are my will too.
They are the ache of love.
They are my essence.
I cry.
I cry the truth of crying.
Bitter tears of weeping.
And I love each drop.
They carry you, they carry me.
They carry the truth.
They are meant.
And I willed against them.
As if that would keep my strength.
And then I admit that I love that I have cried.
I felt pure.
To be pure is to be holy.
These tears are holy tears.
They are confessions of the soul.
They are offerrings.
They are pain and they are beauty.
They are love and they are loss.
They are what is most wanted.
I look into the air for you.
I whisper for you as gentle breezes through the trees.
Listen Serena.
Come back.
I know you have loved me.
What once was, ever was.
But I want more because I love more.
I want more until I die.
And if your love stays til then, then it stays.
Like the sun.
Do not end it before then.
Do not make it a voluntary act.
I love loving you.
It is one of the things I do in life.
As I breathe.
Listen Serena, hear my breath.
Hear my whispers.
Hear my longing.
Turn my longing into song.
The song of our lives.
I feel to be a searcher, except I have already found.
Ease the search Serena.
Come back, appear.
Do what you already know to do.
So easy and for so very long.
You know how.
It’s your love I speak of.
It is in you, you have done it.
You have the practice of it.
I am not asking for something new.
I’m not asking for more than I’ve had.
Just the same thing more.
Nothing that requires a miracle.
Or a storm against heaven.
You have such power.
Power over my hope.
What is hope?
Is it the delay of failure?
Is it the quest for life?
Use your power for life.
Every day is as if I am dying.
Release me from my prison.
Destroy this invisible force that keeps us from each other.
That keeps me from myself.
Such a power you have.
Such a power Serena.
Over all the course of life.
Save me from a course I do not want.
To lose you, to be apart from you.
I could never want such a thing.
Use your power, use it.
Use it.
Appear.
Do it.
I send force fields to you to do it.
The glory of heaven for you to appear.
The salvation of life.
Such a power Serena.
The return of all the beauty of the Earth.
The memory of myself and all.
Someone said, memory is the scribe of the soul.
You are my memory, my soul.
You are the Earth.
You are the story of my life.
Words are life.
These are my words.
My whispers.
Hear them.
Listen Serena, come back to me, come home.
I’m home.
On my knees and home.
I am waiting on the floor by the door.
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